I was extremely fortunate to be chosen to attend the Season Of The Witch workshop and residency at Live Art Ireland – an intensive three days of working with Frances Mezzetti, Beth Greenhalge and Tess Wood, followed by two solid weeks of residency at Live Art Ireland’s magnificent Milford House all facilitated by the absolute force of nature that is Deej Fabyc.
I’ve needed this for a long time, and the theme of the residency particularly called to me as I’ve had an obsession with the metaphysical since childhood – the occult and witchcraft was one the the first ways I attempted to understand my then undiagnosed neurodiversity – and following the emotional toll of the More Than Human Project I very much needed to be somewhere far away from that which is usual and that which is expected of me.
The workshop was phenomenal – and through it I developed my first piece of one to one performance in ages: Trolling Hard or Hardly Trolling? which was a playful combination of the traditional troll-under-the-bridge and the modern troll-behind-the-keyboard. Each audience member had to have their digital fortune read using my previous work The Gift Horse’s Mouth before being sent on their way. Sometimes with a grunt, sometimes with a smile, most often with a internet related Barnum statement (“How many abandoned blogs?” “Just so you know, they really do appreciate the cat memes” “DELETE YOUR BROWSER HISTORY!!!!”). The sharing event contained some of the most beautiful and thought provoking work I’ve seen in a long time, and it was a total privilege to be counted in that company.
Then the hard work began – suddenly I was without the structure of the workshops and was entirely self directed, and in such blissful surroundings that I had trouble not thinking of it as a holiday. The massive dining table that we’d been struggling to get enough chairs around was now only half full, and with fewer physical people in the house the personality of the building itself came into its own. Milford House seems to exist in an entirely unique relationship to time and space – it’s kind about it, and welcomes you into it’s fold but it’s difficult to make work when you’ve not made it through that metaphysical airlock. The plans I’d had before seemed to belong to someone else. The only idea that seemed to resonate was vague plans to do something to release my tension and fury at certain aspects of the world. This led to two AV projects – The Woman In Black trilogy and TTFSU!
The Woman In Black developed throughout the residency, starting as a means of purging my own feelings of impotence and frustration and making space for me to reclaim my own sense of joy in the world. The three films Blood and Fury, Rain Must Fall and Regrette Rien are viewable by clicking their titles and were filmed using my laptop webcam with additional sound recorded on site.
TTFSU stand for… Time to F*£k S*!t Up, after lyrics i wrote for my absurdly chipper alarm tone (Homecoming on Samsung for those who are interested). It was a way to do something small, quick and joyous that was affirming and empowering, and has a magnificent cameo from Live Art Ireland’s hound Ziggy. Content warning for coarse language!
Then there was the making! I did do a few bits of metal work, and started some experiments that i quickly realised i needed more equipment than my luggage weight allowed in order to do what I wanted with.
But would the Roden actually be the Roden if stitching wasn’t involved somewhere?
To be honest I brought a few embroidery supplies more as a comfort blanket than with any real intention of using them, and specifically chose items that were project surplus rather than trying to create something new. One of these, a square of tabby weave linen which was a scrap from The Austin Variations, was used as a cloth for the Troll performance as part of the divination set. Then I did a bit of stitching with the repro 11th century embroidery thread left from that same project to create a four square foot manageable space. Then I began to add details relating to the house and the area – the bats that flew by night, and the swallows that replaced them during the day, the plaster mouldings which looked for all the world like an anguished lion, and the delicate decorative touches which adorned the stairwells. Now, the embroidery is starting to build up and has quite naturally become both a potential addition to The Gift Horses Mouth and a work in and of itself:
Following the residency I feel a lot more clear-headed: about why I make work, how I make work and letting go of some peculiarly painful losses and events I cannot change. I’m feeling more resilient and able to properly consider the next steps in More Than Human, a project I care so deeply about it somewhat broke me and that I’ve been avoiding thinking about for the past 12 months.
If you ever have the opportunity to visit or work with LAI absolutely do it – it’s intense and incredibly worth it.
Vicky Roden 